The desire to get married, which - I regret to say, I believe is basic and primal in women - is followed almost immediately by an equally basic and primal urge - which is to be single again.
I am continually fascinated at the difficulty intelligent people have in distinguishing what is controversial from what is merely offensive.
Beware of men who cry. It's true that men who cry are sensitive to and in touch with feelings, but the only feelings they tend to be sensitive to and in touch with are their own.
When you slip on a banana peel, people laugh at you; but when you tell people you slipped on a banana peel, it's your laugh. So you become the hero rather than the victim of the joke.
Insane people are always sure that they are fine. It is only the sane people who are willing to admit that they are crazy.
If pregnancy were a book they would cut the last two chapters.
Summer bachelors, like summer breezes, are never as cool as they pretend to be.
What my mother believed about cooking is that if you worked hard and prospered, someone else would do it for you.
Denial has been a way of life for me for many years. I actually believe in denial.
In my sex fantasy, nobody ever loves me for my mind.
When you're young, you think that clothes are almost magical, and that if you wear the right thing - to school, to the prom, on the date, etc. - something's going to happen. Black, it's the anti-magical thing. It comes from the recognition that it is not going to be 'the' dress.
The realization that I may have only a few good years remaining has hit me with real force, and I have done a lot of thinking as a result. I would like to have come up with something profound, but I haven't.
When you realize you want to spend the rest of your life with somebody, you want the rest of your life to start as soon as possible.
Death is a sniper. It strikes people you love, people you like, people you know - it's everywhere. You could be next. But then you turn out not to be. But then again, you could be.
With any child entering adolescence, one hunts for signs of health, is desperate for the smallest indication that the child's problems will never be important enough for a television movie.
My mother wanted us to understand that the tragedies of your life one day have the potential to be comic stories the next.
As far as the men who are running for president are concerned, they aren't even people I would date.
My mother was a good recreational cook, but what she basically believed about cooking was that if you worked hard and prospered, someone else would do it for you.
I try to write parts for women that are as complicated and interesting as women actually are.
I don't care who you are. When you sit down to write the first page of your screenplay, in your head, you're also writing your Oscar acceptance speech.