Jenny Eclair

Jenny Eclair

Biography

Author Profession: Comedian
Born: March 16, 1960
Age: 56 years old
Birth Sign: Pisces

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Jenny Eclair quotes

A good fart joke makes me bawl with laughter, so will somebody farting. And the word 'poo.' You can't beat a good poo joke.

My older sister is bossy, my brother is a stirrer and me - well, I am perfect!

I am very short-sighted, and if I don't like a situation I take my glasses off.

I think as time goes by you'll get female comics who are weirder - you'll get a female Mighty Boosh.

I wouldn't say I was grumpy. It's more pathological - I have seismic tantrums. I get red in the face and cry at least three times a week, and I have to lie down and have a nap afterwards.

I am best viewed from a distance... and at night.

I can eat a man, but I'm not sure of the fiber content.

Anyone who has dead straight hair wants curls.

I admire the Elsie Tanners and Barbara Windsors of the world: people who have crawled back from the abyss. I'm quite camp in that respect.

I might be needy, competitive and desperate but it's far better than being wet.

I prefer highs and lows to an even keel. Moderation is never something I've been good at.

I have a fear of poverty in old age. I have this vision of myself living in a skip and eating cat food. It's because I'm freelance, and I've never had a proper job. I don't have a pension, and my savings are dwindling. I always thought someone would just come along and look after me.

I'm the least spiritual person in the world. I can't even abide a smelly candle. I know it's meant to make me relax, and that immediately makes my hackles rise.

There should be more booing in shops and restaurants and places like that when when the service is bad. If you've had a poor breakfast in a hotel, you should put your knife and fork down and boo.

Well, I'm not good with sliminess. I hate the thought of creatures that have slime on them or creatures that leave a slimy trail. At home, the sight of a slug can bring up my breakfast.

What has happened to the good old-fashioned travel agent? I want to go to a really posh travel agent and have them organise everything for me. I don't want to do things on the Internet.

As a rule, wearing a bigger pair of jeans looks better than squishing yourself into a pair of jeans that used to fit before you gave up smoking.

Family is the one thing that is definitely not disposable.

I am best viewed from a distance.

I am not sure gender ever won't be an issue in comedy, because I think that women do have different priorities in some respects.

Nobody knows what anticipation is anymore. Everything is so immediate. Joan Jett age

The adrenaline of a live performance is unlike anything in film or theater. I can see why it's so addictive. Gwyneth Paltrow

I always loved acting and improv and sketch comedy and theater, which I did at a local youth theater. Emma Stone age

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