"What a man needs in gardening is a cast-iron back, with a hinge in it."

Charles Dudley Warner
(09/12/1829 – 10/20/1900)
US writer

"[The War Office kept three sets of figures:] one to mislead the public, another to mislead the Cabinet, and the third to mislead itself."

Herbert Henry Asquith
(09/12/1852 – 02/15/1928)
English Prime Minister (35) (was married to Margot Tennant Asquith, father of Elizabeth Asquith Bibesco and Cyril Asquith, great-grandfather of Helena Bonham Carter; see other British PMs)

"We must respect the other person's religion, but only in the sense and to the extent that we respect his theory that his wife is beautiful and his children smart."

H. L. Mencken
(09/12/1880 – 01/29/1956)
US writer

"Old age isn't so bad when you consider the alternative."

Maurice Chevalier
(09/12/1888 – 01/01/1972)
French singer, actor

"An economist is a man who states the obvious in terms of the incomprehensible."

Alfred A. Knopf
(09/12/1892 – 08/11/1984)
US publisher

"As long as the producers want me and the Almighty doesn't."

Desmond Llewelyn
(09/12/1914 – 12/19/1999)
Welsh actor, on how long he would play 'Q' in the James Bond movies

"One chance is all you need."

Jesse Owens
(09/12/1913 – 03/28/1980)
US runner

"There is nothing stronger in the world than gentleness."

Han Suyin
(09/12/1917 – )
Chinese writer

"When smashing monuments, save the pedestals—they always come in handy."

Stanislaw Lem
(09/12/1921 – 03/27/2006)
Polish writer (note: a different person from Stanislaw Lec)

"There's people making babies to my music. That's nice."

Barry White
(09/12/1944 – 07/04/2003)
US singer

"A lot of 18-year-olds are like old men. They think they've seen everything."

Ben Folds
(09/12/1966 – )
US singer, songwriter

"No sh*t, everything is a double-edged sword. Even a single-edged sword is a double-edged sword. Because on the one hand it's sharp but on the other hand it's dull....a single-edged sword is a double-edged sword."

Louis C. K.
(09/12/1967 – )
US comic