"There is only one absinthe drinker, and that's the man who painted this idiotic picture."
"They are so afraid we shall break down, and you know the reputation of the college is at stake, for the question is, can girls get a college degree without injuring their health."
"The art of Biography
is different from Geography.
Geography is about Maps
but Biography is about Chaps."
"Early to bed and early to rise probably indicates unskilled labor." John Ciardi
"I used to do drugs. I still do drugs. But I used to, too." Mitch Hedberg