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Isaac Newton "I can calculate the motion of heavenly bodies but not the madness of people."

Sir Isaac Newton
(12/25/1642 – 03/20/1727)
English scientist
Clara Barton "The door that nobody else will go in at, seems always to swing open widely for me."

Clara Barton
(12/25/1821 – 04/12/1912)
US humanitarian, Red Cross founder
Chaja Rubinstein "All the American women had purple noses and gray lips and their faces were chalk white from terrible powder. I recognized that the United States could be my life's work."

Helena Rubinstein
(12/25/1870 – 04/01/1965)
Polish-US cosmetician
"Success seems to be connected with action. Successful men keep moving. They make mistakes, but they don't quit."

Conrad Hilton
(12/25/1887 – 01/03/1979)
US hotelier (great-grandfather of Paris Hilton; was married to Zsa Zsa Gabor)
Cabell Calloway III "My audience was my life. What I did and how I did it, was all for my audience."

Cab Calloway
(12/25/1907 – 11/18/1994)
US bandleader, singer, drummer, entertainer
Denis Pratt "When I told the people of Northern Ireland that I was an atheist, a woman in the audience stood up and said, 'Yes, but is it the God of the Catholics or the God of the Protestants in whom you don't believe?'"

Quentin Crisp
(12/25/1908 – 11/21/1999)
One of the Stately Old Homos of England
Rod Serling "It is difficult to produce a television documentary that is both incisive and probing when every twelve minutes one is interrupted by twelve dancing rabbits singing about toilet paper."

Rod Serling
(12/25/1924 – 06/28/1975)
US writer
Alan Kniberg "As life's pleasures go, food is second only to sex. Except for salami and eggs. Now that's better than sex, but only if the salami is thickly sliced."

Alan King
(12/25/1927 – 05/09/2004)
US comic
Irish Elizabeth McCalla "I couldn't act, but I could swing through the trees."

Irish McCalla
(12/25/1929 – 02/01/2002)
US actor , on her role in Sheena, Queen of the Jungle
"No person is important enough to make me angry."

Carlos Castaneda
(12/25/1931 – 04/27/1998)
US anthropologist, writer
"[My daughter loves playing] cowpersons and Indians."

Anne Roiphe
(12/25/1935 – )
US feminist, writer
"Ideas are to literature what light is to painting."

Paul Bourget
(09/02/1852 – 12/25/1935)
French writer
"Writing good editorials is chiefly telling people what they think, not what you think."

Arthur Brisbane
(12/12/1864 – 12/25/1936)
US editor, writer
Jimmy Buffet "Truth is stranger than fishin'."

Jimmy Buffett
(12/25/1946 – )
US singer, songwriter, parrothead head
William Claude Dukenfield "The son of a bitch is a ballet dancer."

W. C. Fields
(01/29/1880 – 12/25/1946)
US comic actor , on Charlie Chaplin
Mary Elizabeth Spacek "You don't forget the movies, but you forget the details of them."

Sissy Spacek
(12/25/1949 – )
US actor
Karl Rove "As people do better, they start voting like Republicans—unless they have too much education and vote Democratic, which proves there can be too much of a good thing."

Karl Rove
(12/25/1950 – )
US political manipulator and general all-around slimeball
Annie Lennox "Dying is easy, it's living that scares me to death."

Annie Lennox
(12/25/1954 – )
Scottish singer (Eurythmics)
Doug Ferrari "Bush doesnít know the names of countries, he doesnít know the names of foreign leaders, he canít even find the Earth on a globe."

Doug Ferrari
(12/25/1956 – )
US comic
Helena Christensen "In modelling, there is no point in trying to prove you have a brain, so why even bother? I'd sooner save the energy for something more meaningful."

Helena Christensen
(12/25/1968 – )
Danish model
Charles Spencer Chaplin "All I need to make a comedy is a park, a policeman, and a pretty girl."

Sir Charles Spencer Chaplin
(04/16/1889 – 12/25/1977)
English-US comic, actor, director
Joan Blondell "In the 20s, you were a face. And that was enough. In the 30s, you also had to be a voice. And your voice had to match your face, if you can imagine that."

Joan Blondell
(08/30/1909 – 12/25/1979)
US actor (was married to Dick Powell, Michael Todd)
Dino Crocetti "Shirley—I love her, but her oars aren't touching the water these days."

Dean Martin
(06/07/1917 – 12/25/1995)
Italian-US singer, actor
James Brown "Disco is James Brown, hip-hop is James Brown, rap is James Brown; you know what I'm saying? You hear all the rappers, 90 percent of their music is me."

James Brown
(05/03/1928 – 12/25/2006)
US singer
Eartha Mae Keith "I am learning all the time. The tombstone will be my diploma."

Eartha Kitt
(01/17/1927 – 12/25/2008)
US singer, actor