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"I almost think it is the ultimate destiny of science to exterminate the human race."
Thomas Love Peacock
"If there's one thing for which I admire you, it's your original discovery of the Ten Commandments."
Thomas B. Reed
US Rep (ME)
, to Teddy Roosevelt
"The eye sees only what the mind is prepared to comprehend."
"There are obviously two educations. One should teach us how to make a living and the other how to live."
James Truslow Adams
"It takes a clever man to turn cynic and a wise man to be clever enough not to."
Singer: "You know, my dear, I insured my voice for fifty thousand dollars."
Miriam Hopkins: "That's wonderful. And what did you do with the money?"
"I expect you'll be becoming a schoolmaster, sir. That's what most of the gentlemen does, sir, that gets sent down for indecent behaviour."
"If you just try long enough and hard enough, you can always manage to boot yourself in the posterior."
A. J. Liebling
(was married to Jean Stafford)
"It's not the end of the world, but you can see it from there."
Canadian Prime Minister (15)
(was married to Margaret)
, on Edmonton, Alberta, Canada
"I was with some Vietnamese recently, and some of them were smoking two cigarettes at the same time. That's the kind of customers we need!"
US senator (NC)
, at a dinner to promote the state's tobacco industry
(Jesse's the older boy on the left)
"Results! Why man, I have gotten a lot of results. I know several thousand things that won't work."
Thomas Alva Edison
"We have a strange and wonderful relationshiphe's strange and I'm wonderful."
US football coach
, on QB Jim McMahon
"I'm just your wild working musician."
US singer, songwriter
"Sometimes I want to clean up my desk and go out and say, respect me, I'm a respectable grown-up, and other times I just want to jump into a paper bag and shake and bake myself to death."
"It takes me forever to say my prayers these days, but I don't care, because this time around, I want to make sure God doesn't have to do any guesswork."
"Whoever said, 'It's not whether you win or lose that counts,' probably lost!"
Czech tennis player
"In real love you want the other person's good. In romantic love, you want the other person."
Margaret Caroline Anderson
"We are confronted with insurmountable opportunities."
"How sad would be November if we had no knowledge of the spring."
Edwin Way Teale
US writer, naturalist
"I like the character of Charity because she's so hopeful. She's never bitter, and plenty of things happen to her that could make her bitter. She always thinks tomorrow's going to be beautiful. And someday it will be."
US actor, dancer
(was married to Bob Fosse)
"Television is more interesting than people. If it were not, we would have people standing in the corners of our rooms."