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Johann Sebastian Bach "My present post amounts to about 700 thaler, and when there are rather more funerals than usual, the fees rise in proportion; but when a healthy wind blows, they fall accordingly..."

Johann Sebastian Bach
(03/21/1685 – 07/28/1750)
German composer
Beatrix Potter "Thank goodness I was never sent to school; it would have rubbed off some of the originality."

Beatrix Potter
(07/28/1866 – 12/22/1943)
English writer (Peter Rabbit)
Marcel Duchamp "Anything is art if the artist says it is."

Marcel Duchamp
(07/28/1887 – 10/02/1968)
French surrealist
John Ashbery "There is the view that poetry should improve your life. I think people confuse it with the Salvation Army."

John Ashbery
(07/28/1927 – )
US writer
Jacqueline Lee Bouvier Kennedy Onassis "There are two kinds of women: those who want power in the world, and those who want power in bed."

Jacqueline Lee Bouvier Kennedy Onassis
(07/28/1929 – 05/19/1994)
US royalty (see other US First Ladies; was married to John F. Kennedy, Aristotle Onassis)
Marie Dressler "I have no patience with women who measure and weigh their love like a country doctor dispensing capsules. If a man is worth loving at all, he is worth loving generously, even recklessly."

Marie Dressler
(11/09/1869 – 07/28/1934)
Canadian-US actor
Dr. William James Mayo "The examining physician often hesitates to make the necessary examination because it involves soiling the finger."

Dr. William James Mayo
(06/29/1861 – 07/28/1939)
US doctor, clinic founder (brother of Charles Horace Mayo)
Phil Proctor "Minutus cantorum, minutus balorum, minutus carborata descendum pantorum (A little song, a little dance, a little seltzer down your pants)."

Phil Proctor
(07/28/1940 – )
US comic, actor (Firesign Theatre)
Jim Davis "Lord no, I don't make THAT much money."

Jim Davis
(07/28/1942 – )
US cartoonist (Garfield) (also see Jim Davis the actor) , on whether he owns a cat like Garfield
Margot Tennant Asquith "He can't see a belt without hitting below it."

Dame Margot Tennant Asquith
(02/02/1864 – 07/28/1945)
English writer (wife of PM Herbert Henry Asquith, mother of Elizabeth Asquith Bibesco) , on David Lloyd George
Doug Collins "Any time Detroit scores more than a hundred points and holds the other team below a hundred points, they almost always win."

Doug Collins
(07/28/1951 – )
US basketball coach
"The only problem I really have in the outfield is with fly balls."

Carmelo Martinez
(07/28/1960 – )
Puerto Rican baseball player
Diane Nemerov "My favorite thing is to go where I've never been."

Diane Arbus
(03/14/1923 – 07/28/1971)
US photographer
"Polling is merely an instrument for gauging public opinion. When a president or any other leader pays attention to poll results, he is, in effect, paying attention to the views of the people. Any other interpretation is nonsense."

Dr. George H. Gallup
(11/18/1901 – 07/28/1984)
US pollster
"Hollywood to me is a civilization easily as complex, fascinating, and mysterious as ancient Egypt."

Don Carpenter
(03/16/1931 – 07/28/1995)
US writer